Denika Laurie asked:

Many times throughout our life, we find that we end up repeating certain patterns, certain patterns that may not serve us in an ideally favorable way. We meet people in different scenarios and different life experiences hoping for something new and exciting, but instead, get dealt a bad deck of cards, or so we believe. Why do I always get the men/women that treat me like crap? Why do I always get the men/women that don’t support me and my dreams? Why do I always get the men/women that only want me for my money? All of these are questions that are commonly asked, yet the person asking the question usually fails to look within them to figure out what beliefs they have that are attracting those same people over and over and over again.

You Believe You Must Go Through This

For everything that we do, there is always an underlying reason or a key belief, as we like to call them in Theta Healing. You see, you have these belief programs that are running in your subconscious like the hard drive on your computer. These key beliefs of yours go all the way back to your childhood, to your family genes, and even to your soul. Somewhere within the system of beliefs, you may be feeling like the only way you can be fulfilled is to have problems in a relationship. Maybe this is your way of proving to yourself that you are resilient or tenacious. Perhaps having problems in a relationship make you feel like you have purpose in life. Maybe, just maybe, you’ve been told by family and friends that it is “normal” to experience the things that you have been experiencing in your relationships and there is nothing you can do about it.

These beliefs are affecting your feelings and your actions toward your loved one. In fact, the beliefs are so strong that it affects the way you carry yourself, the way you perceive yourself to the opposite sex, and even how you respond to the opposite sex and it probably goes beyond all of that.

The truth is that you don’t HAVE TO continue going through what you are experiencing unless you choose too.

You Are Still Holding Onto Resentments, Regrets, or Grudges

The majority of the time that we spend trying to recreate or reinvent ourselves is wasted simply because we refuse to let go of resentments or regrets. We usually create the resentments as a need to protect ourselves from getting hurt by that same person or the same type of circumstance. Grudges and resentments go hand in hand and if you remove one, you can easily remove the other. Regrets are things that hold us in a pool of low self esteem and you know, there isn’t too much that you can get done without good esteem. Esteem affects your personal power, so the more you dwell on regrets, the more you relinquish your personal power.

The Women/Men in Your Family Have the Same Type Of Problems

Have you ever had anyone in your family that you looked up to or considered a role model? Sure you did. Even if you didn’t, the people in your family affected you in ways that you probably still have yet to comprehend. You can be repeating the life patterns of your family members. In fact, there could be a part of you that believes that if certain family members weren’t happy in their love life, then you won’t be or don’t deserve to be. It can be any number of things as beliefs, feelings, fears, and behaviors are passed down genetically.

You Don’t Deserve To Have A Good Relationship

Have you ever caught yourself saying “this is too good to be true” or “good things don’t happen to me”? How about this one: you are experiencing a wonderful time with your loved one and because you haven’t found anything wrong YET, you are just waiting for the unthinkable to happen. I could go on with many examples, but I think you get the idea. The point is that for some reason, on a subconscious level, you don’t believe you deserve to live a good life. You might even find you’re sabotaging the relationship because you are afraid of getting hurt or that something was going to go wrong sooner or later. You just don’t know how to accept good things and good people whole heartedly. This has a lot to do with self acceptance, self trust, and self love. With all of the examples that I mentioned above, Theta Healing can remove all of these things and more, in an instant and then replace it with something more positive, empowering, and life changing.

If our outer world is a reflection of our inner world, then what parts of ourselves have we yet to face? Most of you have found a way to cope with the things that have hurt you. You either ignore it and hope it goes away and pretend it never happened or you complain about it so much that everyone around you knows about it. In doing these two things, you are shutting down yourself and not allowing yourself to live life freely. If you choose to continue living your life not facing your weaknesses or traumas, then life itself will be your constant reminder that you need to deal with this in order to move on. The key word here is being able to “move on” and moving on is not ignoring a situation or jumping into another relationship right away to make the pain go away. If you cannot take time to be alone to recuperate from a bad relationship then you have yet to learn what love is and even worse, you have yet to understand your personal power which was developed even more so from that last relationship.

In the end, you have to consider the quality of life that you want to live. Feeling good and being happy is an internal process that takes time to develop, but once you reach that state, the happiness and peace will always be there no matter what happens in your relationship. Clear up the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual clutter in your life and then you will attract/find someone who has done the same, and this is what will allow you to experience a new kind of life, a new kind of love. Besides, after you clear up your clutter, your standards are going to change and how you feel about what you want will change too. This will create a different aura around you that will bring you the new life experiences that you desire and deserve.

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